An Opportunity for Kindness - Stephen Green - Issue 6

‘Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle’. Ian MacLaren

“I ask you all to arm yourselves with positivity and optimism in the face of all challenges. Challenges are opportunities for success”. HH Sheikh Mohammed bin Zayed

I can’t recall a half term holiday that has been welcomed as much as this one. Everyone I have spoken with, be it staff, student or parents, needs this break. This pause. We’re exhausted, but we’re happy.

Given the restrictions and protocols imposed upon society and schools, to have completed a half term in the way that we have has been an incredible achievement by everyone involved. For me, success and happiness have been achieved through co-operation and kindness to each other.

There is no better place than DESC to witness a more harmonious collaboration where we have all helped each other through these confusing times. We should constantly remind ourselves that we can all do small, random acts of kindness during our busy days which make a difference. We can be unfailingly polite to every single person that we meet. We can listen to someone’s problem without immediately comparing it to one of our own. We can pick up some litter – even if it’s not ours. Importantly, even behind one’s mask, we can also smile at everyone we see.

There is a great uncertainty to life under Covid 19. Our mental health and wellbeing are all under strain. Juggling remote learning, new timetables, social distancing, assessments, mock exams, applying to universities or simply keeping a mask in place can take its toll. However, the stress has been alleviated by us being there for each other. Care, concern and compassion for everyone in our community means that we will also be able to navigate the difficulties that may lie ahead. Kindness should always be at the heart of this and we all have a moral obligation to keep this in mind. As a father, a teacher and a leader I always remind myself to show my children, and our students, what being kind can look like. As a College, we encourage our students and staff to get involved and support our local community by organising collections or raising much needed funds for those less fortunate or in a more difficult position than ourselves. We are at pains to recognise and celebrate kindness when we see it in others. There has been patience, empathy and understanding when students, parents or colleagues appear particularly ‘reactive’; it stems from an understanding that we will all experience the effects of the pandemic differently. Lastly, we should be kind to ourselves by not expecting perfection. We should simply do our best in these challenging circumstances and that will be ‘good enough’. We must also remember to be kind to ourselves. To carve out the time in a day or a week, to do something that makes us feel happy. Below you will see an example of an act of kindness to myself, which has been finding the opportunity to spend time creating linocut artwork (my new hobby).

It has been, and in so many ways, continues to be, a difficult time. To present this through ‘rose-tinted’ glasses would be a mistake. Many of us have experienced sadness, loss, loneliness and, at times, anger. Anger derives from deep losses related to our life, our work, our finances, routines, our fears about our health and loved ones, or simply being able to spend time with friends and family. It is tough. Our world has changed and although it is temporary, reality has shifted and being bereft of normalcy, feeling a loss of connection with others has developed an associated form of grief. This type of grief is confusing too. We know something is not quite right, we feel disconnected, and this has broken our normal sense of safety. However, we can accept this and move on. We can control what we do, especially if it is a simple act of washing one’s hands, putting on a mask and keeping a safe distance between yourself and others. Importantly, remembering to be compassionate and patient to everyone you meet is important, because ‘everyone is fighting a hard battle’. 

There are, therefore, clear opportunities. Teaching students about social responsibility and how seemingly small acts of sacrifice and kindness can improve our lives. There exists now a delicate balance between what we do for ourselves and doing what we want, to looking out for others and doing what is best for everyone else. Knowing what we do has a direct impact on others puts things into context; no more so than now. We are all responsible and regardless of how many times it needs to be said, modelled or reminded; doing the right thing for others is the greatest form of compassion and kindness.

I’ve always sought to be driven by an internal compass that points to the words ‘be kind’. I believe it’s one of the most important things to remember right now. Living in a time of Covid has infected us all in many ways. We can feel anxious, fearful, frustrated, sad and even angry. In a time when so much in the news is about ‘R’ numbers and contagion, we mustn’t forget that kindness too is infectious. I don’t mean to be glib here. There is something naturally inspirational about being kind. No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted, it’s simply an opportunity to make someone feel good. Wearing a face mask is not a chore nor is it a sign of one’s politics, it’s a simple act of kindness. It won’t surprise anyone to hear that I’m still smiling through my own mask.

Have a wonderful half term.

Stephen Green

Assistant Headteacher